inquiry, uncertainty & magic found here...

hey there...

 

i just want to pop in & let you all know that i'm going on a retreat, in my own life, in my own home.  a retreat into the hearts of my small band of men, into the depths of my pantry, the lengths of waiting fabric & into the blank pages of my sketchbooks.  they need me, & i need to be be present for them.  their preferences, which i have alluded to in past posts, range deep & wide.  i am living in the magical tension between unschooling, a waldorf school, & a fancy college-prep where 80% of both parents have PhD's.  between a life with no goals & my former life, where i played with activists, ceo's & nobel nominees on creative expression.  between a dream life in the woods, a return to life with really nice things, or a simple life, with, hopefully, a goat & some chickens.  in any case, a renewed vegetable garden & some baby rabbits look inviting.  

 

i am mourning some change, as certain hopes & dreams have been realized & my way of life isn't really appropriate anymore.  there's space now for new challenges & new opportunities to make a difference.  there may be space for me to learn the ukulele, finally.  i am having a predictably hard time watching my little ones get big.  i've always told myself not to pull out the video camera, which, unlike film, separates me from my family.  in the past i've been comforted by the fact that i've been there, with them, through all of it.  but now i'm wishing for a little more views of their younger selves.  in any case, i'm here for this latest series of transitions, but my own personal center is between here, maui & new hampshire.  again, a retreat is needed.  because that doesn't really sound very centered, now does it?

 

i have so many people to thank in this space.  most recently molly, for feeding me so much over the last year & most recently last week, with an insanely tasty meal of potato-corn tamales, beans & fresh salsa.  you are just so damn fun.  love you.  and tricia, for your smiles, which i can hear even over the phone lines.  your friendship & the experience you bring is so precious to me.  one day after our call, & my boy loved writing again.  i ordered a boatload of his made-up candy & his lettering went from boring & dreaded to curvy & colorful.  thanks for reminding me to step off his learning.  some real structure will come into play, but it will be under the broader unschooling umbrella.  even if it means school.  i am seeing how that's possible.

 

and those sites i mentioned at the turn of the year.  i hope to come back & really introduce you all.  when i can come back full.  thank you.

 

for those that were wondering, granny (my boy's great-grandmother & my beloved mentor & friend) was whisked out of Haiti this past week safely.  a doctor she works with took it upon himself to take her in an ambulance.  after several days in the u.n. tent, he flew her out, along with his wife, their child, a Haitian man needing his legs amputated & a badly-burned infant.  i didn't have the chance to post an article in the boston globe last month, where she was front-page news.  i am so proud of her.  president clinton's office called to make sure she had gotten out okay, & she has, but only to return again to her beloved Haitian family at some point.  when i do return to this space, it will be with a number of items from Haiti.  they are the best crafters, at the end of the day.  (samuelle is also okay)

 

i'll be back, but don't know when.  i'll be hanging with my loved ones...