"When you do not speak, the thousand stars that lay upon your tongue slide back down your throat only to be swallowed one by one, jagged, pointed and weighing more than planets. When we swallow the truth, we turn our bodies into graveyards."
Two images insisted in speaking to you together this month, Shadow Gardener and Butterfly Song, one that speaks of mining our shadows and the other whose message is around speaking our truths.
We are in the tides of Samhain and I’m sitting to write this, deep in contemplation over how insistent Butterfly Song was to come forward at this time, time of veils thinning and shadows emerging and how connected it is to Shadow Gardener, diving into our own shadows.
It is deep soul work to be constantly clearing the throat chakra, to ensure that the words that fly out are truly the words you wish to see set flight and that none are left behind, their delicate wings furled around their truths, your truths. I’m thinking both of those who were burnt at the stake for speaking their truths. I’m thinking of those who are silenced because their words might shake foundations long overdue to crumble. I’m thinking of how knowing our truths often requires us to walk the path of Persephone and traverse both the spring gardens in the light and the depths of the underworld, to incorporate it all into out being, the contradictions, the shadows and the light, all of it, all of us. I’m also thinking of those insidious little lies that slip out to shield someones feeling, to keep the peace, slowly wearing away at our integrity like water over a stone. It may seem calm but its slowly washing away parts of the whole.
Speaking our truth first means knowing our truth and that is not always easy especially given that truth is plural and ever changing. It involves diving into the underworld, looking in the shadow and claiming the truths that we don’t even wish to speak to ourselves. Owning it all, our humanness.
Speaking our truths also means knowing the difference between expression and projection- its the difference between expressing to clear and be seen vs inflicting and perpetuating. Expression holds much power, the power of manifestation, and I think that this is where some of the fear comes in. It is where the heart must lead and intentions direct- trust in your divinity.
Rumi says 'The wound is the place where the Light enters you.’ and as much as I love the wisdom and beauty of Rumi, I lay in shavasana one day and it hit me that he had it backwards, the wound is the place where the light shines out of you, those delicate and vulnerable places of truth.
Sometimes I think our expression is our most important work, especially if we are to allow spirit to dream through us which spirit surely wishes to do. Expression in its purest form connects the throat chakra with the sacral chakra in a creative dance of transformation led by Anahata chakra. Dive deep into your shadow gardens, dig deep in the fertile grounds of your truths, express cleanly and truly all that wishes to be born through your full and radiant expression. Let your expression dance spirit into this world.
picking seeds off the bones, out of the darkness
what precious fruits
she will conjure
diving past mask’s reflection through turbid depths filled fertile with life’s shunned unpolished gems
healing through attention, disregarded treasures
rise with flamed wings
to guide even Persephone
Shadow Gardener rises through the veils by the wings of her gifted prize
no gold coins needed
She who gardens the shadows stands tallest in the light